whining.

Level of stress is increasing to inferno-like proportions. Family came down tonight. It was nice to see them, but kind of awkward since none of them are too pleased about my decision and didn't even really respond to Hollie's toast to me.

Oh well. Got some advice on my sit ups. Gonna practice it before I go to bed here shortly to see if I can pass that damn PT test in the morning. I really want to get these sit ups down. ups down. Leane offered to cover the last part of my shift tomorrow, which is relieving some stress. I think I'm just kind of generally freaked out, and tired. I'm not sleeping much, at least not when I need to. Slept through most of the weekend though. I really wish I could at least write my parents while I'm at Basic, but since they're basically unavailable, I doubt if I'll really be able to keep in touch. I just want someone to write to who might actually be proud when I do well, rather than hoping I'll get an Article 15 and get kicked out. Either way, I have every intention of kicking fucking ass at this shit. I have a thing about proving people wrong when I think they've underestimated me. It's not always a good trait, but it might actually help in this case. Will power is going to mean everything in this endeavor. I have the ability, just need the will to reveal it. And I think I've got that too. I'm going to rock. And I'll be proud of myself. Not the first time being lonely, not the last either. I'll be fine. I don't really need the support, it would just be nice if I had it.

Ah well. I feel like I'm whining a lot, which should stop. It just kind of sucks. I think I'll actually be happier to some degree once I'm there, with other people going through the same shit instead of here, with people who just don't understand.